Listining

I have said it before and I will say it again. If you listen to what the world is telling you, you will be guided in your decisions. I am not saying that the right answer will be yelled to you by people you pass in the street. I just believe that the clear answer will come to you with time.



"THE House"  #2

The most recent example of this just occurred in our home-buying saga. As you may know, S and I are looking to buy a house to hold us over until we can move onto a boat in about 13 years. We looked at one about a week ago, just before we went on the 2012 Boat Trip. Our realtor found it for us on Wednesday and we went for a quick look  Wednesday night before we headed out Thursday morning. S fell instantly in love, (She said it was THE house of her dreams, just like the previous one we put an offer on a couple of weeks ago), with the house and her girls T & M liked it as well. I was indifferent with it as the house was nice, clean, redone and ready to move in, but did not have the special something that I would like. We were there about 20 minutes. On Thursday, we decided to make an offer and our realtor faxed us the paperwork at the Presque Isle marina where we were Thursday evening. Actually, it took her about 4 tries to fax it to us. On Friday, we tried to fax it back from the Roger City marina. We tried 3 or 4 times. The we drove to hotel and managed to send it from there. I told S that I was beginning to get the feeling that somebody was telling us something because of all of the trouble it was to send the fax. She said I was being silly.

The buyers rejected the offer and countered.  We countered and finally agreed on a price (considerably higher than I believed the house to be worth and way too close to the original asking price), and by Monday evening, I had another paper to sign and send back. I managed to print out the email from the realtor and sign it, but I could not get my scanner to work. I could hear the voices tell me to hold on again. I finally had to drive to work to scan the documents back to the realtor. I should have listened. Tonight, we met the realtor at the house and a home inspector at the house. (Note: I am fully capable of performing a house inspection, but I like to have an independent person involved who is looking analytically, not I, who was looking with my heart and checkbook). I was fully prepared to write the deposit check tonight. I did take the opportunity to measure and photograph each room. When I got to the basement, the first thing I noticed was that the basement wall had all sorts of metal plates tying the wall back and basically preventing the house from collapsing. I do recall seeing the plates last week, but they did not really register what they were.

See the large metal plates on the wall behind the freezer that tie the wall back
 

I immediately put a halt to the inspection and told the realtor that the defect in the foundation wall was a fatal flaw and a deal breaker. S was disappointed, but she understands. I explained that the repair was not performed correctly and was equivalent to sticking a band-aid on an amputated limb.

If I had listened to the signs of the world, realized that troubles with the fax, and the higher price and everything were yelling at me, I might have saved a bit of stress, and the money for the inspection.  It was kind of clear at the time and blatantly obvious now that this was not the right house. On to the next one.

For the record, the inspector agreed with my assessment of the half-ass repair. It could be fixed correctly, but would require the house to be jacked up and the wall torn down and rebuilt. I don't want to dump that kind of money into a house to just make it an OK house without that special something

Glaciers and Volcanoes

When I was married to Ex, her narrow range of temperature in which she was comfortable drove me nuts. She was always too hot or too cold. She could turn the heat on until she was warm, walk over to the thermostat and then turn the air conditioning on. Did she know what this does to my utility bills?

Once I was free of her, I thought that complaint of my life was gone. The first winter away, I lived in an apartment and kept the thermostat at 59 degrees. All winter. (OK, so I would also take a hot bath before bed to warm myself up for the night....I paid for heat, the landlord paid for water and hot water).

Fast forward to my present life with S. She can honestly sit on the couch in a sweatshirt and a throw blanket with the air conditioning on. She and Ex have only two things in common: They have both been married to me and they both have the same narrow comfort range.

I recently spent a day driving around the UP of Michigan in my Jeep with an engineer for a project I was working on. It was July, but the temperature ranged from 48 to about 63 during the day. I had the roof and doors off the jeep, just as I do at every available opportunity throughout the year. Now the engineer did choose to ride with me, there were others he could have rode with, but he was uncomfortable all day. I was in my short sleeves and he had a warm coat on. He was still cold. He would not admit it, but I could tell - he lives in North Dakota.

I have come to the conclusion that these people are not abnormalities. I am the strange one. I am comfortable between 55 and 90 degrees. 65 is perfect, but anywhere in there is OK. I do not like it too too hot or too too cold, but I can get by if I have to.

So, In an OFFICIAL APOLOGY to S and to a lesser part, to Ex, I am sorry that I give you a such a hard time about the HVAC. I will try to remember that you are entitled to be comfortable if you try to remember that every time you touch that little box, it costs me money.

I once worked with a very religious guy (gave 1/3 of his income to the church and used to tell me "you can't take it with you, but you can always send it on ahead"). He used to have crazy thermostat wars with his wife. He thought he solved the problem by installing a programmable thermostat, but she just used the override buttons. He then installed a locking cover over it like schools and offices have. She got around that by putting a cold-wet or hot-wet rag over the cover and fooled the thermostat. He finally ended the problem by installing a second programmable one in the basement by the furnace and disconnecting the one in the main living area. He did not tell his wife he did this. She would get cold, walk over, push the warm button and she would be just as happy as a clam because the little light came on and she thought she was getting warmer. Same thing with the ac in the summer. She was not really controlling anything, but she thought she was. Now, I do not advocate tricking your spouse, it is a good way for my friend to reunited with his tithe sooner than he planned....

I try to set reasonable limits. I don't argue if S wants to turn the heat up if it is below 65, or turn the AC on if it is warmer than 85. S takes a fair amount of liberties with these limits (Suggestions???)

I do have a personal problem, I HATE air conditioning. Turn it on and I have an instant headache, My nose plugs up and I get crabby. It's my problem only. I am the strange one *VBG*

(My apologies to artists for the cartoons I stole here)
(My apologies to S for including her in the same blog post as Ex).

The ever expanding universe

First blog post. Whoo Hoo.

So I have delayed creating a blog for a long time, but it is finally the right time to start this. For years I have said that someday I will loose the ex-wife and someday I will find the right girl. Someday I will move and become financially stable. Someday I will get a jeep .Someday I will buy a boat. Someday I will do xxx. Someday I will stop doing yyy. And someday I will do zzz ..... someday. Well Someday came and I am finally starting this blog.



Just add Graham

First, a purpose......I guess this is to be a kind of diary - log book - daily record of what I do and how it gets done. If you don't care, the I will save you a lot of time and suggest you go away.  If you choose to stay, be forewarned. My life is constantly moving in about a dozen different directions, I am being pulled apart at the seams and always busy. Therefore, I actually accomplish very little that anyone notices. That is really ok, because I love to be busy all the time. I don't like sitting around growing old.



S & I on a beach in Key West 3-9-2012
 

Me - I was born, grew up and zoomed through high school. I went to college, met the wrong girl, had a daughter, graduated, married the wrong girl, bought a house, had a son, moved a bit, was divorced by the wrong girl. Met the right girl, moved in with the right girl, married the right girl and here we are. Right now, we live in the Bay City area of Michigan.


Family - I have a daughter  who is a sophmore in college. We'll call her K. I have a son who is in middle school - J.  My wife (S) has two elementary school aged daughters T & M. I also have my parents who live up north in Harbor Springs and  my brother and his wife who live in Metro Detroit.


Home -  We live in a little lego sized house on a postage stamp sized lot. I am ok with it. We have too much stuff and would have more room if we got rid of half of the stuff.  S is not so convinced so we are looking for a slightly bigger home. If it makes her happy, then fine. I do have a few constraints, but nothing exotic.

Work - Degreed as a geologist, I work as an estimator for a communications construction company. Work is work and I go because I have to, not because I want to. I am always on the lookout for a new better opportunity. I would like to find a self-employement type job that allows me to get paid as hard as I work with no ceiling. I would really love to be independently wealthy, not have to worry about work, and spend more time not really accomplishing anything.

M/V Someday Came

Boat - The water is my first love and my mistress The wife knows it. I introduced the two of them on our honeymoon cruise. I finally bought a boat this spring. It is a little old and a little rough and I lover her. We have named her Someday Came. I grew up on boats. Row boats and peddle boats and pontoon boats. Little deck boats and larger vacation trawlers. Cabin cruisers and small yachts. I love boats and I love the water. This first boat is just a stepping stone, a two year boat. Then on to something bigger. She is a 1979 Chris Craft Catalina. I love the classic lines; she does not look like the "bleach bottles" they make today.



The Plan - One thing I do have is a firm solid plan. In september 2025, we are getting on a sailboat and spending at least 10 years sailing around the world (or at least all that is left by then). By 2025 the youngest kid - M will be 18, hopefully graduated and on her way to college with good scolerships and grants. That way S will be free to come with me. If not, I will make sure that she can catch up as soon as she can. The kids and anyone else are welcome to visit, but this is a trip for two.

I don't know if this will involve selling the house and getting rid of everything or just storing it all. I don't care at this point, its a ways away. I would love to buy a 60' slow trawler and power my way around, but I don't have that kind of coin and don't anticipate I will by then. So a sailboat it is. Lots of people cruise the world on 40' sailboats (some on 30's and even 20's - I'm crazy, I am not stupid (my mom had me tested)). It is a plan at least. How many other people Have a plan for the next 25 years?

Enough for now.